


Cardinal Virtues

by TaxicabKanefessions



Category: Night at the Museum (Movies)
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-08-02
Updated: 2015-08-02
Packaged: 2018-04-12 14:23:05
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,194
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4482623
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TaxicabKanefessions/pseuds/TaxicabKanefessions
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>They both have roles to play. Octavius is just far more aware of them than Jedediah.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Cardinal Virtues

A low whistle jolted Octavius from the mental rehearsal of his speech, and just as quickly into a heavy sigh.

“That sure is the nicest dress I've seem them put you in yet,” Jedediah said, in a tone that appeared to be his best attempt at a compliment rather than a joke. “What's this getup for?”

“First off,” Octavius began as he raised his arm for the servant to continue dressing him. “My guards are becoming far too lax if they're allowing you to simply wander into my chambers any time you like.”

“Ha, yeah probably.”

“Secondly, have you honestly been calling me 'toga boy' for decades without knowing what one looks like?”

Jedediah plopped himself down in a chair. “Guess so. Looks bulky.”

“It's incredibly comfortable, especially compared to the confining 'getup' you're always running around in.” He allowed the last portion of fabric to be draped over his other arm. “What's brought you over here?”

“Figured we'd go for a drive, but it looks like you're busy. Not often I see you get out of your armor and all.” Jedediah raised an eyebrow as the wreath of oak leaves was positioned, carefully, on Octavius' head. “And wearin' plants.”

Octavius shot him a look as he shooed the servant away. “I'll have you know this is one of the highest honors we have.”

“What'd you get it for?”

“I ended a civil war caused by my predecessor's assassins. And to answer your original question, we have a senatorial meeting tonight. I don't allow anyone to appear in the Forum without proper formal wear. I can't very well not follow that, myself.”

He frowned, hesitantly. “So that one time where we all came in for that peace treaty, I was supposed to be wearing one of those?” The look only deepened when Octavius began to laugh. “The hell's so funny?”

“Of course you wouldn't wear a toga!” He wiped his eye as he settled himself back down. “You're not Roman.”

“I could still pull it off.”

“It's not about 'pulling anything off,' Jedediah. It is a badge of citizenship and manhood, and it's absolutely banned to-”

“Barbarians?” Jedediah asked, eyebrow raised.

Despite being a politician, Octavius had one of the worst poker faces that Jedediah had ever seen. He picked awkwardly at a loose string and muttered, “I was going to say 'foreigners'.”

“Mhm.” He kicked his feet up onto the arm of the chair. “So, would I at least be man enough to wear your bed sheet if I was a freeborn or whatever you call it?” Jedediah scowled when he was met with more hesitation. “What now?”

"I don't know why you're concerned about it. The ideals of masculinity are very different, based upon culture,” he said with a dismissive shrug. “And, to be fair, you do hit many of the notes that Romans are expected to. You're strong in battle, you're a fine speaker, your foolhardiness is mostly in check...”

“So what's the problem?”

The response, murmured and aimed towards the far wall, caused Jedediah to sit up.

“Come on, Oct, speak up. What's the issue with ol'-”

Octavius turned back with a scowl. “Fine. A Roman man does not allow himself to be utilized for sex. Happy?” He readjusted the wreath in his hair. “Now, I really must be off, and...”

“Wait, wait. So the reason you always top is because if I did, you wouldn't be a man anymore?”

His mouth strained. “Not exactly. But you didn't seem to mind, and so I figured that your culture didn't either...”

Jedediah stiffened, body tense and ready for a fight. “Not the damn point. If screwin' me makes you a man, what's that make me?”

“I don't know, but it's nothing to concern yourself about. If you were Roman citizen it'd be something, but you're not. So you're alright, we're alright, and if I don't leave this second I'm going to be late.”

Jedediah looked him up and down. “This isn't done.”

“I didn't think it would be.”

*****

The guards really did need to shape up. With little more than a wave Jedediah was past the ones posted at the entrance to the Forum, and he wasn't even questioned as he stopped just outside the senatorial meeting room. He supposed that the short period of peace had made them soft, but it certainly hadn't done the same to their leader.

The Octavius inside the senate wasn't recognizable as the fumbling man he'd been in his chambers. Here he spoke precisely, with such control and power that he had everyone's attention and respect even if it didn't necessarily have their agreement. He was the ultimate representative of his people, and he handled that responsibility with as much dignity and skill as Jedediah supposed anyone ever could have.

Sometime long before then, Octavius had vented during one of their drives about how exhausting his position was. That he couldn't just be a general, a ruler, or both, he had to be an idol. He was expected to be the ultimate Roman, who all of his people would try to emulate, or else he was bringing his divine right to rule into question. No matter how many other labels he tried to sidestep, that one simply wouldn't go away.

Jedediah had brushed it off as job stress that was being expressed in overly-flowery terms. Competent as he was, Octavius so often managed to talk molehills into mountains that it could be hard to tell what exactly needed attention. This whole manly thing might just have been one of those things that really was a mountain.

When his speech finally came to an end, Octavius took his seat in a billow of red and white fabric. Before he could take a sip of wine and glance up at the doorway, Jedediah had taken his leave.

*****

"I didn't expect you to stick around."

Jedediah cracked his eyes open, but didn't bother to lift his head. "Didn't think it'd take that long. You guys don't shut up."

Octavius placed the scrolls back on the desk. "A proper republic takes time and work, you can't expect us to rush it."

"There's a difference between not rushing and spending all night in one meeting."

"I suppose you have a point there." He slowly began to unwind the toga. "So have you come to any conclusions, or have you just been lounging in my chair all night?"

"I did some thinking," he replied as he recrossed his legs over the arm of the chair. "Seems to me you're between a rock and a hard place. And I'm willing to play along, as long as you're willing to be up front. Got it?"

Down to his white tunic, and headed for the garb he was expected to be in by morning, Octavius changed course and took a seat opposite of Jedediah. "What would you like to know?"

"Let's start with if you've figured out a term for me, yet."

"No," he admitted, and offered an apologetic smile. "But if it helps, you're the manliest barbarian I've ever met."

Jedediah began to chuckle after a beat. "Yeah, I guess that's a start."

**Author's Note:**

> A bit of history: 
> 
> The Romans didn't have the sexual free-for-all attitude the Christian writers liked to portray. Men could have sex with other men, but only in a penetrative role with either slaves or prostitutes. The receptive role (oral or anal) was believed to take no pleasure, and was associated with either the duty of a slave or the rape of a conquered people. A citizen willingly taking the role was seen as threatening his liberty and sexual integrity, and potentially even a sign they were mentally ill. At worst, it was punishable by a wide variety of things including banishment and execution. This was especially true for soldiers who had consensual sex, as they would both be citizens and committing a massive breach of military protocol. The receptive one was this side of guaranteed to get the worse punishment. Since he's still going by Octavius (although at the age he was portrayed he really would at least be Octavian, though more likely Augustus), he'd still be very firmly in that military mindset.
> 
> Jedediah Smith lived and died before the word 'homosexual' was even around, and although there were many anti-sodomy laws at his time they were only selectively enforced at best. The reality of living so long with only what it took to survive instilled an idea that sex was simply sex, and the nature of the partner wasn't of much importance. Men routinely bedded with others, stag dances were a long tradition, and there were even partnerships openly recognized as marriages. People at the time were far more interested in a 'don't ask, don't tell' attitude to sex in general, rather than paying any attention to the fact that homosexuality was downright commonplace.
> 
> So, essentially, Jedediah would be the significantly more open-minded of the two when it came to how the relationship would be carried out. For all the 'why would you want me to hold your hand', Octavius has more hurdles to overcome in creating a mutual relationship.


End file.
